I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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