No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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