Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
