I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
