gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
that is very illegal...i love you.
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