shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
