Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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