i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize