if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
