it wasn't lemon gatorade
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
