If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
