So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
