So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
