That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
