ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize