Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
The Olympian is in my bed
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
