We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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