So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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