Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
two words...techno handjob
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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