i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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