Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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