? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
