I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
