her vagine was all disorganized.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
