Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
