i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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