Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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