If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
