Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize