Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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