So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
