Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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