don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize