just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
