He kissed a someone with a penis
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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