Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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