Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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