More tranny stories later!
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
