shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
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