I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
