no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
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