Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I just had sex on a roof
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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