that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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