Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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