it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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