mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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