i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
