Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
We just shotgunned beers for America
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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