I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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