He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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