Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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