youre lurking in front of me
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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